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I may need more context for this but I'm going to answer it the way I understand it. Were you only eating the cookie because you put it on your plan? You do not have to eat the cookie if you don't want it or aren't hungry for it. The only part I want you to explore is "should I try to avoid the dessert if I could have with no problem?" It isn't whether or not you eat the cookie. It's the reason why you choose to eat it or not eat it. Why would you be trying to avoid the dessert? Is that choice coming from diet rules or from you legitimately not wanting the cookie? There are many times I put dessert on the plan and choose not to eat it because I don't want it or I'm not hungry for it. Some reasons I don't want you skipping foods on your plan is because you are afraid to eat it, you think you won't lose weight eating it, or you are trying to go without it to lose weight as fast as possible.
What matters most is the reason why you do something. Eating low carb isnt good or bad. But the reason you have for eating low carb is because Its what you think will work. I assume you have tried low carb. Has it worked long term for you or have you fought against it because it was challenging to sustain? Remember that to lose weight, you have to stop overeating. But if you know your future includes rice, oatmeal, and quinoa, you are postponing doing that work and making peace with those foods and learning that they don't prevent weight loss. If you love to eat low carb, then that is great. What would be the issue with including rice, oatmeal and potatoes occasionally to practice eating those foods? Nothing changes once you lose weight. What if you can lose weight and enjoy those foods? (you can) Your best plan moving forward is a plan you can follow while honoring your body's hunger and fullness. Perhaps that plan includes both low carb foods (if you truly enjoy them) and higher carb foods you mentioned.
You had health issues and your doctors advised against keto and gave you specific recommendations based on testing. Those are the facts. Diet mentality is when you make decisions based on weightloss and past diet history. So your brain is interpreting these recommendations from your doctor, for health reasons, as all the "stuff youre not allowed to have." But what if there is a completely different way to think about it? You don't have to follow any recommendations of your doctor. But it sounds like you value having a solution that could help with your health issues. It seems like its worth giving a try. Your work will be around creating a juicy story around these changes. One where they serve your highest good and who you want to be vs restrictions. Sometimes the way you learn to love your plan if you love the results it gives you. Instead of focusing on all the stuff you can't have, I want you to make a list of all the things you can have. Make your plan from that list. It's ok to feel disappointment and frustration. Allow yourself to process those feelings. But then decide how you want to show up that allows you to feel amazing. You are worth that. Get coached on a coaching call if you need more support with this!
This is a very common part of the process. As you allow yourself to enjoy foods you previously restricted, you start to actually be able to feel how they feel in your body and make a choice as to whether or not you WANT to include them after weighing the pros and cons. A desire to have more energy and less hunger are great reasons for the foods you put on your plan. But the mindset you have around a "low carb protocol" is triggering your diet thinking and your brain is panicking. I think you are right on about upleveling more slowly. What if you just take it a day at a time starting with your first meal of the day or first 2 meals of the day? What if you didn't have to see it as a "low carb protocol"? I eat many low carb meals, but I don't think about it that way. They are just meals that make me feel great. Watch your brain when it offers that there are only two options here: Plan foods you love and all the flour and sugar... or low carb protocol with exceptions. What if there's a perfect YOU protocol and you are still just finding out the balance of that? You have to have the conversation with your brain that this isn't a tightly controlled diet, this is you experimenting with what balance looks like for you. And again I want to remind you that this is totally normal. Start from where you are at and uplevel 1-2 things at a time. Start slow and be willing to have the conversations with yourself that this is not what you have done in the past so that your brain calms down.
First off, I know how hard that transition can be. Having all the foods available can feel challenging and it may also seem like the reason you are up is because of the carbs, but the reason it is up is because of overeating. And that can be a totally normal part of the process. It’s doesn’t really matter whether you are low carb, no carb, complex carb or all carbs, your work is to honor your hunger and stop at enough/satisfied. What will determine gaining more is if you continue to overeat. If you want balance, it’s important to plan in a balanced way. Include foods you love. Practice eating those foods while really listening to your body while you eat. There isn’t a right answer on “what to eat” other than what makes you feel good and what you enjoy. Use what worked from keto when it comes to foods you like. Add in carbs that you enjoy. Don’t overeat. Your brain will want to complicate it. But the way you break food rules is by showing your brain that it is safe to eat those foods. Give yourself time. If you just decided in May to change what you are doing, make sure you allow yourself the time it takes to learn something new.
Vibe Club will absolutely help you if you work the process that I teach in the weightloss course. Visit the "start here" page and get started. You do not need to give up your favorite foods like cheese and peppermint mochas to lose weight. But I want to invite you to be willing to release the story you have about why you can't lose weight and how nothing has worked and why there is so much standing in the way. If you continue believing that story, you will apply it to your experience in Vibe Club as well and experience the same outcome. You will be quitting before you even get started here. Can you be willing to trust that this is different and cant be compared to the other things you've tried? Vibe Club isn't a diet. It's a place where I help clients unwind their diet thinking and reconnect to themselves after years of being out of touch with their body. Going all day without eating will always drive overeating at night. Vibe Club will give you a process for listening to your body's hunger and enough signals if you're willing to give yourself time to learn and listen. Welcome to Vibe Club!
The way you make it easier is to create a very juicy story around your health. That story will have to be more compelling than eating whatever you want. If it feels heavy and like an unfair obligation, you will push back against it. Spend some time journaling and making a list of your "whys" that will carry you through when your brain starts to complain. I am glad you are noticing the all or nothing possibility that may be triggered by your decision. The cool thing about keto is that if you get fat adapted, your body switches back into ketosis quicker. So staying keto 4 weeks before eating off of keto may be helpful. But remember that advice wont help if that's simply not doable. You will have to play around with the frequency that works best for you and your body.
I drink pruvit ketones, mainly as a pre-workout and moodboost. I do not use them for weight loss. Link is thelowcarbllama.shopketo.com and my referrer code is: thelowcarbllama
What will always answer the question of "is this diet rules/mentality?" is what is the reason I am making this choice? "I can only allow those things if I earn them with a workout" is a diet rule around carbs. Aka: I can have carbs but only if I earn them. And even still they are low carb carbs. You are keeping a very tight grip on the rules of allowance. You don't have to earn food. My challenge to you is to add more carbs on days when you are not lifting. It will make your brain explode a little bit and we want that. Those negative feelings that come up are showing you the diet rules. The way to make peace with food is by challenging the rules and showing safety around the food. As always, listen to your body while you eat and stop at enough.
Give yourself credit for everything you are doing and how you are already thinking about it.Your planned exception doesn't have the power to derail you, but what you tell yourself afterwards does. So def decide what you are going to think afterwards. What are the sneaky things your brain usually says that leads to binging sugar for days? "it doesn't matter" "not in ketosis (if you're keto)" "enjoy yourself before you have to get back to being strict)-- figure out what the thoughts are for you and what to say back. I also want you to go to the place in your mind where you plan the exception, don't over eat and then get right back on your plan the next day. How proud are you? How good does it feel to have new evidence that you can have a different experience? Spend some time in that place. And remember that this is a learning experience and it takes practice.
No such thing as messing up and I truly mean that. I want you to consider that it not possible to change years of behaviors in a week or from watching a video. You’re feeling awful and disappointed because the story you’re telling is “I already messed up twice” What about this story: “I am really becoming aware of the specific instances where I get tripped up with following my plan. And I’m reaching out for coaching so that I can overcome these things and get momentum. I’m proud of myself” I like that description so much more and I believe it’s absolutely true. I want you to go to the worksheet section and print some curiosity worksheets out and do one for this situation. Let me know what insights you get from it.
Hi Jennifer! This is such a great question. First I want to show you some thoughts that are standing in the way of getting to the bottom of this: "choczero is a food that is turning into addiction" "I cant seem to stop with choczero chocolate" "I cant seem to stick to one" "I really feel like I cant stop" "I cant talk myself out of buying it" It absolutely makes sense that you arent stopping when you believe those things. And you are believing them because thats what you currently have evidence for. But you are not at the mercy of choczero. Each time you eat one, you are making a choice and that choice is probably fueled by one of the thoughts above. So two places to look: Kari was dead on that sometimes what is actually happening is ou didnt eat enough at prior meals so start there. second place is: if you didnt keep eating them, what would you have to feel? Deprived? Fomo? Disappointment? You may not feel like its emotionally driven but you may be continuing because you dont want to stop for an emotional reason even if its not super deep. But you dont get to avoid the disappointment or fomo. Because you are disappointed that you arent losing weight and youre missing out on the results you want. You get to choose your flavor of disappointment here. So start at those 2 places. TFD + feelings module could be helpful.
I want to acknowledge that you did choose to stop. You may not like your reason for it, but you did. So take credit for that. Second it is normal to have slip ups. Look at how you’re describing this as the “worst” you’ve been. What if we removed all the judgement? The fact is “I overate on my birthday”… what else could you make it mean? Could It just be that because you forced yourself to eat dinner you weren’t hungry for, you brain went crazy with the story of “well we’ve already overate and we’ve been so good since January. May as well eat all the things we haven’t been allowing?” What if that’s ok? That’s not an abnormal thing on this journey. What if in the future you simply say “I’m not hungry and I don’t want to eat or I won’t love how I feel”. Don’t ruin your day ruminating ❤️ The hindsight you have already gathered will help you next time this happens. And it will happen again at some point. And that’s ok. You are doing great. Enjoy the rest of your birthday weekend!
If it were my honeymoon, I would absolutely prioritize enjoying the food and drinks. But I would also prioritize how I wanted to feel as well. My protocol would prob look something like the 50/50 protocol I discussed in the vacation module! Half of the day would be what I would normally do and most likely dinner and dessert (and a drink) would be just enjoying myself without overeating. Do you have your current protocol decided? What parts of your current protocol will work for you honeymoon? Overeating and binging on past vacations probably came from not having a realistic plan as well as feeling like you may as well go all out while you're eating all the things. It's absolutely possible to have a balanced vacation. You will need a thought plan too. What are the thoughts you want to have on your trip so that you can prioritize following your plan knowing that it is a fabulous doable mix of food that makes you feel great and food that is super fun. You also could decide to eat fun food at every meal and watch portions without overeating. That is an option as well. A honeymoon/vacation doesn't make or break your journey. If you aren't overeating constantly, you aren't going to gain a bunch of weight.
I feel like this podcast will be super helpful as a resource: https://podcasts.apple.com/.../sustaining.../id1487143525...
At the end of the day the only thing that will determine how you feel about it is your thoughts about it. So pics aren’t good or bad. They are neutral. Our thoughts about them will create how you feel. My thoughts after I had my second baby and saw pics from before I got pregnant were “I can’t believe I have to do this again” “I can’t believe I gained 55lbs, I said I wouldn’t let this happen” “I looked so much better then” so for me, not helpful. I could have worked on changing my thoughts about those pics but I decided a better use of my time was focusing on who I would be every day and who I was becoming, not who I had been.
If you’re drinking regardless, plan a drink. Then it’s a choice and there is permission there. You can still lose weight while drinking but normally the issue isn’t the drink it’s drinking too much and then eating a bunch that we didn’t plan. Best way to figure it out is to practice and collect feedback!
This is really a great question and will be helpful to so many people who have changes in routine coming up with the summer. You already have identified the issue. Two things you are believing is that you have difficulty making and following a plan and you treat it as a vacation when he is home. But it's not any harder to make and follow a plan when he is home. You are just telling yourself those things above and then making choices not to prioritize sleep, eating or a routine. They don't have an ability to go out the window without your consent. You have a certain routine you've created when he is home. And its not currently working. So if you don't want your husband being home to activate yolo mode, you will have to change your thoughts about him being home. When he is home, you deprioritize your habits. If you want to do something different, you will have to choose to think something different. What changes do you need to make to your protocol/plan so it is realistic for when he has time off? Plan more fun food? Eat breakfast? There is going to be a balance of making the plan more doable and managing your brain around the fact that when he is home it isn't eat all the things time and put yourself on the back burner. How can you enjoy your husband and keep your promises to yourself so that you don't find yourself feeling terrible come august?
Have you finished the weightloss course? I would go back through the feeling the feels lesson + the urges lesson. Your brain is presenting food as a solve. That makes sense. It's a well practiced pattern. So if you were absolutely unable to solve with food, how would you solve it? The alternative to eating emotionally is allowing yourself to feel what you are feeling without judgement. When you practice that you realize that you are capable of feeling any feeling. What is wrong with being sad? or stressed? Those are normal human emotions. But when we judge them as something going wrong, we use food to escape.
You've lost 29 lbs since December and gained a little vacation weight. It will literally be gone within the week, I'm sure. Have your own back. You made a choice to go off plan so that you could enjoy your barcelona trip. Your brain is just throwing up weightloss BS thoughts and I'm proud of you for noticing and addressing them. They are showing you where there is still some work to be done. Because if you dont address those thoughts, you will still have similar ones once you do reach your goal weight, they will just be a different flavor. So spend some time digging into the way your brain is panicking and making some vacation weight gain mean you will never reach your goal. Those are just very old default thoughts. And it truly doesnt matter if they come up. What matters is if you believe them.
Absolutely take into account the strength training. That always throws things off for me for a bit. But thats when I have to have the conversation that its very likely I am losing fat and gaining muscle. When ryan got his follow up dexa scan last year it showed that he had only lost 14 lbs but that was because he put on muscle and lost fat. Overall I think he lost 28 lbs of fat. The scale is not a good representation of fat loss. Stick it out.
I would revist your original post from before your honeymoon. Reexamine what you planned to do. Are you doing that? What you are feeling in your body could simply be more bloat and water retention than youre used to. It could be digestion related (mine always gets jacked on vacay). You dont have to do anything drastic. Make a plan daily and while youre eating pay attention not to overeat. I dont want you ruining A TRIP IN PARIS with thinking that youve messed something up. Make sure to hydrate and give yourself credit for noticing what is happening you joined VC right before this trip so its probably not the easiest situation to learn hunger and fullness on your honeymoon. But as Becky said what happens on this trip does not determine your ability to be successful. As you have said, you are not going yolo mode. Celebrate that. Enjoy yourself and your honeymoon!
I want to take a second to just acknowledge what you are noticing. It is so normal for your brain to offer this. It’s something you have done and practiced. You brain hears “vacation in two weeks” and says ok it’s go time to lose weight as fast as possible! But you are noticing your diet thinking. And interrupting the pattern. Deciding not to crash diet leading up to the event and then deciding not to throw common sense eating out the window on your trip will create new evidence. And when we create new evidence we create a new identity! If it worked in the past, you wouldn’t be here doing this work. I’m so glad to hear planning and following your plan is going so well. What if instead, you spent the next 2 weeks really honing in on hunger and fullness so that you are fully prepped to show up for yourself on your trip?
Really dig into that question “why can’t I just do what I plan?” What’s the answer? What are the obstacles standing in the way? You’re doing the work and not every day will be easy. Not every day will be hard either. You know what to do next ❤️ Make a plan and dust yourself off.
If your body isn’t hungry, you don’t want to eat because then it’s being over fueled. However if there is a snack you love, I would account for it at dinner but possibly eating less. But the real way to know if it is a problem is if you are planning it and eating it, is your weight still going down?
I would check out amazon for books on intuitive eating for kids! I am def not an expert at this. The changes I have made are having more nutrient dense snacks available, buying less processed snacks (but not eliminating them. they still have plenty of snacks) and not pushing that they finish their food. I also speak very openly about paying attention to how food makes you feel in your body so my 6 year old can start noticing and he def has!
It’s normal to feel like your kids are causing frustration but kids don’t cause feelings, thoughts do. Spend sometime exploring the frustrating thoughts you had. They will come up again. What can you choose to think on purpose instead? TFD Will come in handy You’re right, we can’t change how the kids behave. You can ONLY change how you respond. This is great news because it means you have the power! The issue is that you would have had to sit with that frustration if you didn’t keep eating. It’s also worth exploring, what’s so bad about frustration? It’s a vibration in your body. What if you got really good at handling frustration without eating? Who would you be on the other side of that frustration? (knowing it will pass for sure)
You never need to start over! Just pick up exactly where you left off. And meet yourself where you’re at. Revisit the weightloss course where I teach all the tools. Make a plan. Follow that plan and listen to hunger signals. That will obvs be a bit wonky for a bit while you’re recovering❤️ feel better soon! Here’s the start here link! https://www.vibewithmaggie.com/members/start-here
Are you filling out curiosity worksheets each day? What are you finding out? What are the thoughts that drive the urges to eat off plan? When I find that I am feeling all wonky for days in a row I really hone in on planning filling meals so I know I am managing physical hunger and I can rule out that it’s not a hunger issue. And then beyond that, I identify the thoughts that are screwing me. “It doesn’t matter” “it won’t hurt” “I’ll start over tomorrow”. And I sell myself on the opposite. You’re talking yourself into eating off plan. How can you talk yourself into following the plan instead? Juicify that story.
You have a good story about being on the trip but your thoughts about the travel home arent as juicy.. "My downfall is the travel home" "none of it matters once I see the candy and chips" "I need massive amounts of sugar" "just another chance to make an unhealthy decision" Those are the thoughts I want you to look at. They are setting you up to not trust yourself in advance. So instead of your brain imagining success its imagining doing what you dont want to do. Heres what I want you to question... does sugar and a big family size of jelly beans help you not be tired? Does it help you feel focused and great while youre driving? I know for me it would make me crash and get super fuzzy brained. Your brain is saying you will fall asleep or starve at the wheel, is that true? These are just thinking errors that if you evaluate you will see arent true. They are based off your old identity and what youve done in the past. But we are shifting that! Why are you totally strong enough to follow your traveling home day plan? How would it feel to come back from your trip and post here and say "I DID IT! I followed my plan and I didnt believe the old story my brain gave me!" What if instead you saw this as your opportunity to practice something new? What would you have to think instead to successfully follow your plan?