[00:00:00] Music: Oh, yeah!

[00:00:04] Ryan: Happy

[00:00:05] Ryan: Friday.

[00:00:05] Maggie: Happy Friday.

[00:00:07] Ryan: I don't really like Fridays.

[00:00:08] Maggie: [00:00:10] I

[00:00:10] Ryan: don't know. I don'tI, I, I don't know. I used to love Fridays and now I'm just like pretty blah about Fridays.

[00:00:16] Maggie: Like, I don't want to be, like, specifically negative but like there's like a [00:00:20] routine during the week and then during the weekend it's just Snacks, kids asking for snacks for, and then eating, and then while they're eating saying they're hungry.

[00:00:29] Music: Yeah.

[00:00:29] Maggie: But all [00:00:30] day. And so that can make it a little bit more challenging. Love my kids.

[00:00:34] Ryan: Being a parent is hard.

[00:00:35] Maggie: Yeah.

[00:00:35] Ryan: It's, uh, so many different challenges.

[00:00:39] Maggie: Yeah. And they just kind of [00:00:40] like morph as the kids get older into

[00:00:41] Ryan: different. Yeah. You think they, you think they get, it gets easier as they get older, but the challenges just change.

[00:00:46] Maggie: Yeah.

[00:00:47] Ryan: And we don't even have teenagers yet.

[00:00:49] Maggie: No. [00:00:50]

[00:00:50] Ryan: So.

[00:00:50] Maggie: Scary.

[00:00:51] Ryan: Um, I had the idea for this podcast today to help people figure out why they might be slowing down their weight loss.

[00:00:59] Maggie: Yeah.

[00:00:59] Ryan: [00:01:00] Um, and I wrote some ideas down.

[00:01:02] Maggie: Awesome.

[00:01:03] Ryan: Number one, and this was your idea, not wanting to hurt your own feelings.

[00:01:07] Maggie: Yeah.

[00:01:07] Ryan: What do you mean by that?

[00:01:08] Maggie: Well, I know [00:01:10] that last week we talked about tough love and stuff.

[00:01:12] Maggie: And so, you know, I, like everything, I just think there's just like, it's a sliding scale, this gray area, it depends, you know, [00:01:20] but I think that what I've seen over and over and over and over again with clients is this, like, they lie to themselves about their [00:01:30] data. So you're lying about the truth. You're not telling the truth about what actually happened because you don't want to hurt your own feelings because you don't want to see the truth.

[00:01:38] Maggie: And then we've convinced ourselves and we [00:01:40] have a episode. I don't know what episode it is, but it's the one clean data versus dirty data. Maybe. I don't know if that's what the title is. Search the

[00:01:46] Ryan: library for dirty data. Yeah.

[00:01:47] Maggie: If you want to get like way more in depth on, [00:01:50] on this specific point, but it's just like, I can't tell you how many times someone's been like, well, and I don't feel like my eight one hungrier stopped at enough data is like [00:02:00] really accurate.

[00:02:00] Maggie: I think I've kind of just been, you know, clicking that I did it, but It's, and then it's just like, Oh, now we're in this impossible position because [00:02:10] the data is irrelevant now. And now we just have to like, guess where, like, which part have you been not telling the truth on.

[00:02:17] Ryan: Because you didn't want to, you didn't want to feel bad.

[00:02:19] Maggie: [00:02:20] Yeah. And then I just like to say like, well, it also feels bad to not know what direction you need to go in next. And so again, it's another one of those trade offs where it's like, I don't want to feel bad in the moment. I want to be [00:02:30] extremely, extremely confused instead, you know? And I know that's not a choice that you're like, Yeah.

[00:02:34] Maggie: Making on purpose, but it, it is, it is the truth. [00:02:40] It's like, is a trade off of discomfort, this discomfort or this one, and like literally they are like flavors of ice cream and it's like, which one do you, but like shitty ice cream. Like

[00:02:49] Ryan: mint [00:02:50] chip?

[00:02:50] Maggie: Yeah. I like mint chip sometimes. What's your favorite ice cream?

[00:02:53] Ryan: My favorite ice cream? Yeah. I Uh, you

[00:02:55] Maggie: like cookie,

[00:02:56] Ryan: cookie dough stuff. I like cookie dough and I like, uh.

[00:02:59] Maggie: What's my favorite [00:03:00] ice cream?

[00:03:00] Ryan: Fuck if I know. Wait. God damn it.

[00:03:03] Maggie: You know.

[00:03:04] Ryan: Do I? Shit, I

[00:03:06] Maggie: can't. What's the one I used to eat out of the tub?

[00:03:07] Ryan: Rocky Road.

[00:03:08] Maggie: Yeah, but Dreyer's Rocky [00:03:10] Road. Dreyer's. Very specific. Why Dreyer's?

[00:03:12] Maggie: Because Dreyer's has full mini marshmallows.

[00:03:15] Ryan: Oh.

[00:03:15] Maggie: Whereas other ones have like marshmallow swirl. It's not [00:03:20] good. And it's not the same.

[00:03:21] Ryan: Okay. I never liked Rocky Road because they had just big chunky almonds.

[00:03:25] Maggie: Yeah. And that is what's annoying. Yeah. So one time when I tried to go to Cold Stone, I tried to [00:03:30] just get Rocky Road the best way it could be, which is just like chocolate, ice cream, and marshmallows.

[00:03:33] Maggie: It wasn't good.

[00:03:34] Ryan: No?

[00:03:35] Maggie: Nope.

[00:03:35] Ryan: You don't like, you don't like Cold Stone. Yeah. You never have.

[00:03:37] Maggie: I mean, when I'm eating the Rocky Road, I'm looking for the [00:03:40] marshmallows with the chocolate. Like that's what I'm.

[00:03:41] Ryan: You should just make your own Rocky Road with your own marshmallows.

[00:03:44] Maggie: Why would I do that when I could pay 5.

[00:03:46] Maggie: 59? Okay. A gallon. Tangent. And honestly, it probably is a lot more than [00:03:50] that.

[00:03:50] Ryan: Yeah.

[00:03:50] Maggie: At this point.

[00:03:51] Ryan: Can you turn the heater off?

[00:03:52] Maggie: Oh. Busted.

[00:03:53] Ryan: Okay. So yeah, not wanting to hurt your own feelings. I don't think people subconsciously know they're doing that. No. Consciously.

[00:03:59] Maggie: No, but it's [00:04:00] like, but once you have the awareness that like, okay, if I'm trying to collect data, just you have to think of it like a science experiment.

[00:04:06] Maggie: Just imagine if you were like, well, basically, pretty much. Kind [00:04:10] of just about

[00:04:11] Music: yeah,

[00:04:11] Maggie: and it was like that wishy washy And then you couldn't take you couldn't take any of the results to be something serious at all [00:04:20] They're relevant

[00:04:20] Ryan: a good way to practice being honest with yourself. If you're using the vibe club app is To put in the actuals

[00:04:27] Music: you

[00:04:27] Ryan: plan a meal if you eat something different put in what you actually [00:04:30] ate

[00:04:30] Music: Yeah, there's

[00:04:30] Ryan: like a little indentation of like you could see what you planned and then you can see what you actually ate

[00:04:34] Music: Yeah, so

[00:04:35] Ryan: That's a good really good way of like being honest with yourself to see like what is actually going on during [00:04:40] this day

[00:04:40] Maggie: Yeah,

[00:04:40] Ryan: you know stuff like that.

[00:04:42] Maggie: What is the what what's the such a significant difference from what I planned versus what I ate? Why what what are the changes did something happen? [00:04:50] in my environment that changed? Something got brought into the office? Do I just never want to eat what I plan? Am I only planning what I should eat? You can get a lot of, a lot of, um, [00:05:00] clarifying information from saying why, why did this change?

[00:05:03] Maggie: And I like to tell people, I like to tell my clients, like,

[00:05:05] Maggie: don't get so caught up on getting perfect data, not perfect data, but [00:05:10] perfect percentages. Try to figure out if what you're looking at needs to change if it's like, I've seen people get caught up about like, well, if I ate this thing, [00:05:20] but this is what I planned, like, do I really have to put? No, you don't really have to.

[00:05:24] Maggie: But why don't you? And then you can look at it and be like, is this a problem to be solved?

[00:05:27] Music: Yeah.

[00:05:28] Maggie: And it might not be. [00:05:30] It's like, Hey, I had planned this snack. But I like I had planned dinner last night. But then Ryan went to the store and he bought something else. And then that's what I ate. Is that a problem?

[00:05:38] Maggie: No. Okay. Cool. I mean, I could have eaten [00:05:40] something with more protein and more fiber, but like, no, it's not a problem that I need to solve. You get to just, you get to look at that. And so what people are worried about is, did I get the yes or the no? When [00:05:50] I'm saying just be honest about it and decide if this is something that needs to change.

[00:05:54] Maggie: Is it coming because you just only want to make decisions in the moment? Is it coming because you don't have any self control [00:06:00] around anything other than in the moment decisions? Okay. That may be something that you want to pay attention to. For you, it might be good to challenge yourself. We're not going to be putting actual.

[00:06:07] Maggie: We're going to be following the plan that we made. And if we don't [00:06:10] follow it, we're going to know that that means we're not making a plan we want to follow.

[00:06:13] Ryan: Oh yeah.

[00:06:13] Maggie: So that's, you know.

[00:06:15] Ryan: I think a good way to look at it is like, your diet mentality wants to be perfect. So you're not telling yourself [00:06:20] the truth.

[00:06:20] Ryan: But like, if you can like step outside yourself, put on your white lab coat and pretend you're a scientist conducting an experiment, you have to have all the information to have a definitive outcome. To, to, to [00:06:30] prove your hypothesis true or false. And so if you can take that form of like curiosity and just like, what's, what are the facts here?

[00:06:38] Maggie: Yeah. Well, and like not treating it like [00:06:40] a diet, like not seeing it in that light, cause it can be very hard to not treat it like a thing you're constantly referring to. to it as like calorie deficit, all that shit is like [00:06:50] your brain is seeing it as something else. And so all the old programming around dieting is going to pop right up.

[00:06:55] Maggie: And it's like, no, this isn't, this is about learning how I'm going to eat for the rest of my life. This isn't some [00:07:00] diet. It's going to be comprised of what's important to me, what's important to me to include, what frequencies, amounts, all that stuff. This isn't a diet. And so when you feel that diet mentality popping [00:07:10] up, you have to remind yourself, this isn't a diet.

[00:07:11] Maggie: It is a means of losing weight. Yes, but it's not. a diet and I have to see it in this different view, this different lens if I'm going to have a different experience with it. [00:07:20] Otherwise, you just, it's just in a new outfit. Not, it's no different.

[00:07:24] Ryan: Next one, next, uh, thing that could be slowing your weight loss down is not [00:07:30] working on obvious problems.

[00:07:32] Ryan: I don't really remember the context behind this, but like, I think maybe people don't know what the obvious problem is, but there's always an obvious problem.

[00:07:39] Maggie: [00:07:40] When it should become very obvious if you're telling the truth and if you're doing The things that I teach with evaluating and the curiosity form and everything like it shouldn't be a mystery [00:07:50] unless you're literally lying to yourself on the point where you're just like ignoring that these things are even happening because there, there should be a natural progression of working them out and being like, this is what I eat.

[00:07:59] Maggie: This is when I [00:08:00] eat it. Here are the, these are the, you know, patterns that I'm noticing.

[00:08:03] Ryan: I remember the context. I remember the context. I was telling you there, there's usually one or two, like.

[00:08:09] Ryan: Obvious [00:08:10] things that people struggle with, like, for instance, like, dinner on the weekends or, like, after dinner for two or three hours, they just can't sit fucking still without eating.

[00:08:19] Maggie: Yeah, or [00:08:20] alcohol, or, like, just these common things where, like, when they hear they need to eat less, they're like, okay, so how do I make breakfast smaller?

[00:08:26] Maggie: Yeah. And it's like, dude, the Not even on the right [00:08:30] playing field like with what the problem is

[00:08:32] Maggie: Unless you want to eat nothing during the day and over eat every night like, you know what I mean? Like I get that we're just moving stuff around but [00:08:40] like I would much rather you look at the eating that you're doing when you're totally full and not hungry at all Than the eating that you're doing at in the middle of lunch when you need to sustain the rest of your workday

[00:08:48] Ryan: So my question to you is is if I [00:08:50] don't know what my obvious problems are How do I figure out figure out what they are

[00:08:53] Maggie: you have to keep track?

[00:08:54] Maggie: You You have to write things down, you have to evaluate what you intended to do versus what you actually [00:09:00] did. And

[00:09:01] Ryan: it's fine. The patterns.

[00:09:02] Maggie: Yeah. That's what it all is. And you think that there's like, what kills me is that we think that it's so like elusive and like, [00:09:10] Oh, I don't know what it is. Can we find it?

[00:09:12] Maggie: And it's like, it's so obvious for me, it was always eating out. And snacks.

[00:09:18] Ryan: Snacks.

[00:09:19] Maggie: Like, [00:09:20] always.

[00:09:20] Ryan: Me too. Snacks.

[00:09:21] Maggie: Yeah. Um, yeah. And fast food. And so it was like, wasn't, like, that needed to reduce, like, significantly. And I had to learn how to eat [00:09:30] snacks on purpose instead of for entertainment or for distraction.

[00:09:33] Ryan: So once you know your, your obvious problem, you can get to work on, like, the biggest obvious problem. Yeah.

[00:09:38] Maggie: But one of the main issues with that is that [00:09:40] people don't want to. to do that. They don't want to eat less snacks.

[00:09:42] Ryan: Yeah. They want to figure out the next hack.

[00:09:44] Maggie: And so they like, yeah. And so it's like, the next hack is eating less, let's do that when you are satiated from [00:09:50] dinner and you know this is clearly just emotional versus like, I'll have one egg at breakfast instead of two.

[00:09:56] Maggie: You know? It's like. Because that also sets up for [00:10:00] more overeating when you're not satiated throughout the day. That's an important aspect of it.

[00:10:04] Ryan: For sure. For sure. Next one. Uh, make, I put, make really big [00:10:10] changes. Bigger change. Yeah. Bigger impact.

[00:10:13] Maggie: Yeah. It's thinking that you need to. Go on this diet that used to work for you, like for me, it used to be keto, [00:10:20] it's, it's feeling like our brain gets convinced that the bigger the change we make, the bigger the impact it will have.

[00:10:26] Maggie: And so it's like, oh, well, if I overhaul my whole diet and I do [00:10:30] that consistently, or like, you know, they do it like, Just for 30 days or whatever, like we do take this big sweeping action thinking that we can endure like a lot of pain for a little bit of time and then [00:10:40] we're going to get a jumpstart. It's again, it's a very hacky way to lose weight that doesn't work for 99 percent of people.

[00:10:46] Maggie: Um, but then we see these people who have done 75 hard and [00:10:50] like whatever. Yeah, it's either

[00:10:51] Ryan: before and after and you're like, oh, fuck yeah, I'm going to do that.

[00:10:53] Maggie: Yeah, I'm going to do that. I can, I can stick this out for 75 days, which again, Not many people are even able to do that. You have to start over anytime you make a mistake, [00:11:00] which like inherently goes against everything that I believe in my heart.

[00:11:03] Maggie: Um, but this isn't, you know, I'm not going to rag on 75 hard. I've done that enough. I have a full episode about [00:11:10] it, I think.

[00:11:12] Ryan: Yeah, I mean, big, big changes. I feel like we're all, we've all done it at one point or another. Big sweeping changes. Okay, like I'm going to, [00:11:20] Wake up tomorrow, January 1st. I do X, Y, Z. A, B, C, D,

[00:11:26] Maggie: One, two, three.

[00:11:27] Ryan: You know?

[00:11:27] Maggie: Yeah. And thinking that it's like, [00:11:30] this is the, this is the ticket. And like, I think we get such a big dopamine hit, honestly. I think like when we have these thoughts that are like, tomorrow everything changes and you're like, [00:11:40] yes, that's exactly what I need is for everything to change.

[00:11:43] Music: Yeah.

[00:11:43] Maggie: Oops.

[00:11:44] Maggie: So, it's just realizing that that is not how most things work. [00:11:50] Most things do not just get radically changed overnight.

[00:11:52] Ryan: Yeah, I mean, you're right. You do get a lot of dopamine from changing so many things, and you don't get a lot of dopamine from changing one little thing.

[00:11:59] Maggie: Yeah.

[00:11:59] Ryan: Out of your [00:12:00] day.

[00:12:00] Maggie: Yeah. It's just.

[00:12:01] Maggie: It's just. And it's also, you get a lot of dopamine from deciding to change, I mean, you don't even have to really do it, for real. You can [00:12:10] feel that big rush, I mean, obviously it's very short lived, but like, even the possibility just floods your brain with just like

[00:12:17] Ryan: Well, you used to buy Herbalife [00:12:20] shakes.

[00:12:20] Ryan: Mm

[00:12:20] Maggie: hmm.

[00:12:20] Ryan: Right? And they would come in the mail and then, like, not even drink them.

[00:12:24] Maggie: Well, those were good.

[00:12:25] Ryan: I know, but like, that's, it's an example of, like It is

[00:12:27] Maggie: an example of, like, here's my box of my changed [00:12:30] life. It's here at my doorstep. Right, right. Like, everything changes. I just have to follow this easy path.

[00:12:34] Maggie: Like, two shakes a day and one protein focused meal. This is so easy. Wait a

[00:12:38] Ryan: second. That's what the plan was? [00:12:40] That's what the plan

[00:12:40] Maggie: was. I'm starting

[00:12:41] Ryan: to remember now. It's coming back.

[00:12:43] Maggie: I just really love the cafe latte shakes and the cookies and cream. Why don't you buy them again then? But I was making them with [00:12:50] milk.

[00:12:50] Music: Okay.

[00:12:51] Maggie: And my coach lady was like, No, you can't make it with milk. And I was like, but it's really good with milk. And it's like, yeah, that's kind of the whole deal. So I don't know [00:13:00] if I ever ended up making them without milk.

[00:13:02] Ryan: Maybe you could use skim milk or something. Yeah. Maybe. I don't know. Probably tastes like shit still.

[00:13:06] Maggie: They were good though. But like, but I couldn't just eat them. [00:13:10] Two of those and then one meal like I was just

[00:13:12] Ryan: seems kind of crazy.

[00:13:13] Maggie: Yeah, I was really hungry

[00:13:14] Ryan: But

[00:13:14] Maggie: yeah, it's it's the possibility of this could this could change everything and that

[00:13:19] Music: yeah

[00:13:19] Maggie: [00:13:20] feels good But then with everything then the hard work kicks in and it's like I say the same thing with my program It's like yeah, there's a lot of possibility here But

[00:13:28] Ryan: I mean, there's a lot of work [00:13:30] to do from joining your program

[00:13:31] Maggie: for sure.

[00:13:32] Maggie: Yeah

[00:13:32] Ryan: A hundred percent.

[00:13:33] Maggie: Yeah.

[00:13:34] Ryan: And then two or three weeks pass and then it's like, oh, okay, this is, this is work.

[00:13:38] Maggie: Gotta watch stuff and [00:13:40] do stuff. I have

[00:13:40] Ryan: to, I have to intentionally stay connected in

[00:13:43] Maggie: this

[00:13:43] Ryan: and I have to show up every day and do work.

[00:13:46] Maggie: Yeah. It's like, I give you the path, but I can't like drag you down it.[00:13:50]

[00:13:50] Music: Yeah.

[00:13:50] Maggie: You know, so it, it, it all exists there, but there's just, I don't know why we feel like we can skirt the work of weight loss when. You can't really skirt the work of [00:14:00] anything. Like, you can save yourself time for sure, but like, you're not, like, how many times have you been, like, doing it around on that piano?

[00:14:07] Music: Upstairs? Yeah. I bought a new piano.

[00:14:09] Maggie: Yeah.

[00:14:09] Music: Like a little [00:14:10] digital piano thing.

[00:14:11] Maggie: It's like you're, he's trying to like get his brain to remember stuff the next time he sits down. And like, it's not, it's not just effortless where all of a sudden he's able to play [00:14:20] these amazing complicated songs. It's like, it takes time.

[00:14:24] Ryan: Yeah. I'm literally To refresh and to Wire my brain to make my fingers move the way I want to.

[00:14:29] Maggie: Yeah.

[00:14:29] Ryan: It takes time.

[00:14:29] Maggie: [00:14:30] It's just fascinating to me that I, that people are just like. That learning any new job, any new skill, any new habit, like we understand that it takes time and like we also [00:14:40] are like very compassionate with like, well, you just started like, it makes sense that you don't know how to do this completely, or you haven't really done any practicing of the thing, so [00:14:50] why would you, to cover the people who are like, no, I've been at this a long time, but like, when you say you've been at it, like, how much have you actually been at it?

[00:14:57] Maggie: And If not much, then [00:15:00] we shouldn't expect the results of someone who's put in the work every day for a year when you're dipping in and out of it, you're going to have the results that show from the [00:15:10] time put into it that you've put into it.

[00:15:12] Ryan: I think what makes weight loss especially difficult is that you can put in small effort.

[00:15:18] Ryan: Day over day, week over week [00:15:20] and still not see as much change as you would say for instance practicing the piano. I could sit down for a 20 minute session and then the next day I can tell my fingers are [00:15:30] doing it a little easier. Just from one session I can see progress but with weight loss, that progress I feel like is delayed more than most things.

[00:15:38] Maggie: That's true. I mean, but you also [00:15:40] are, like, you have experience playing on a piano and stuff, like, in a sense it's like you are waking up just old memories of stuff. That's true. But yeah, no, you're not going to be like, oh my gosh, this is so [00:15:50] much different than it was yesterday. But yeah, like, I just kind of think about starting any job and I'm like, the amount of time it takes before you don't have concerns,

[00:15:59] Ryan: it's the [00:16:00] worst.

[00:16:00] Ryan: Not knowing what you're doing sucks. Asking questions all the time and like. Being annoying to your co workers. That all sucks. It sucks. Well, and I think that's why you emphasize non scale victories [00:16:10] too.

[00:16:10] Maggie: Yeah.

[00:16:10] Ryan: Because you have to.

[00:16:11] Maggie: You have to see progress in some

[00:16:13] Ryan: respect. In some way. And if you're not.

[00:16:16] Ryan: actively trying to notice that stuff, you're gonna, you're gonna feel like, why am I doing this? [00:16:20] Yeah,

[00:16:20] Maggie: 100%.

[00:16:21] Ryan: Next one. Let's see. Let's see. Let's see. Keeps them coming. Focusing on the should, the shoulds.

[00:16:27] Maggie: Yeah. Yeah, it slows you down. A [00:16:30] problem that I see come up a lot is planning the way you think you should plan and then eating a bunch of shit that isn't what you planned instead of just eating the shit that you're going to eat and learning to eat it in a [00:16:40] way that serves you or in a way that feels like, okay, this is part of my life.

[00:16:43] Maggie: This isn't forbidden. This isn't something I shouldn't eat. So that you keep just showing up and banging your head against a wall because you keep planning the [00:16:50] way you should, you think you should, you keep working out the way you think you should, you keep doing what you think you should, which is just literally delaying learning what's going to [00:17:00] actually be sustainable for you.

[00:17:01] Ryan: Where do these shoulds even come from?

[00:17:02] Maggie: The diet industry.

[00:17:04] Ryan: Really?

[00:17:04] Maggie: Yeah.

[00:17:04] Ryan: That's sad.

[00:17:05] Ryan: Showbiz. That's why I think you should find some like legit people to follow online and just [00:17:10] ignore the rest.

[00:17:10] Music: Yeah.

[00:17:11] Ryan: How do you, how do you, how do you determine like who's legit to follow online?

[00:17:16] Maggie: I don't know. Because also like some people resonate at certain times in your [00:17:20] life and some people don't at all.

[00:17:21] Maggie: And it's just kind of like, you just kind of see what piques your interest. But just remember to not get super distracted. Because I mean, most people have a [00:17:30] method that they really believe in because it worked for them. You know, so it's like, but we all know that like, we've tried a lot of those methods and um.

[00:17:37] Maggie: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:17:37] Ryan: I've heard They did or didn't

[00:17:39] Maggie: work for one reason or [00:17:40] another. I

[00:17:40] Ryan: think it was Lane Norton said this to like, cause his whole thing online is like disputing all the diet bullshit online. So I think he's a great follow, and he's backed by science. But one thing he [00:17:50] said is like how to trust somebody online is like, if they don't really hold their beliefs very strongly, they're willing to change their mind about stuff.

[00:17:57] Ryan: Those are people that you can trust.

[00:17:59] Maggie: [00:18:00] Yeah, it can be hard when it's just a full commitment without

[00:18:03] Ryan: Keto is the only way.

[00:18:04] Maggie: Yeah. Yeah.

[00:18:05] Ryan: Carnivore is the only way, seed oils will kill you.

[00:18:08] Maggie: Yeah.

[00:18:08] Ryan: Very [00:18:10] hard lines drawn in the sand. You should be wary of those people.

[00:18:13] Maggie: Yeah. Just pay attention to your gut feelings and, and also know that most of us are probably swimming [00:18:20] around in a bunch of different, or at least multiple different philosophies and things that resonate with us.

[00:18:25] Maggie: Um, but it can also be a really good distraction. Yeah. To get super focused on [00:18:30] like one specific thing like apple cider vinegar or like some certain food that you shouldn't eat or should eat and it's like, at a certain point we have to be like, okay, what's realistic for me? Is it really [00:18:40] realistic that I'm never going to have a piece of cake anymore?

[00:18:42] Maggie: Like is it realistic that I'm never going to have Doritos again? Like what, what's realistic for me? Because a lot of [00:18:50] the super, you know, whatever, whatever you want to call them, there are just really strict do's and don'ts and rules and whatever. When I think that you're always able to [00:19:00] uplevel things at a later date, so it's good to meet yourself where you're at instead of being like, okay, here's the book that has all the stuff of all the 16 things I need to change in order to have a [00:19:10] body like her when chances are her body's probably made up of different things that you couldn't possibly copy completely.

[00:19:19] Maggie: And ultimately if it [00:19:20] comes to weight loss, they ate less in a way.

[00:19:22] Ryan: In one way. In a way. One of a million ways. Yeah.

[00:19:25] Maggie: And so you have, you get to decide how you want to do that. [00:19:30] And for many people who end up here, like they've, they've tried many, many, many, many, many.

[00:19:34] Ryan: Most people have. And so

[00:19:35] Maggie: they know what has worked and what has not worked.

[00:19:37] Maggie: And normally the rigidity of it has, [00:19:40] has Not works for most people. Yeah.

[00:19:42] Ryan: Last thing that might slow down your weight loss. Dude, why

[00:19:44] Maggie: do we have so many? It's five. Oh my goodness. This is the last one.

[00:19:46] Ryan: This is a good one [00:19:50] actually.

[00:19:50] Maggie: Yeah.

[00:19:50] Ryan: Not managing your sleep and your stress.

[00:19:52] Music: Yeah.

[00:19:53] Ryan: People, I think people react to stress and they react to their, their inability [00:20:00] to get sufficient sleep and they think that's just the cards they were dealt.

[00:20:03] Maggie: Yeah. And then you focus so much on the eating, on the overeating versus the, Over stressing [00:20:10] like we're looking at ways to Eat less but not taking into account that like the stress levels in your life and your ability to manage them take time for yourself Do self care get [00:20:20] whatever break you can get. Um Has a really big effect on your eating

[00:20:24] Ryan: Sleep and stress is actually now that i'm thinking about it is is huge.

[00:20:28] Music: Yeah

[00:20:28] Ryan: When I when I don't [00:20:30] get enough sleep my appetite goes through the roof when i'm stressed Yeah. The urges are much stronger. Yeah. To cope with the stress.

[00:20:37] Maggie: Yeah. For sure.

[00:20:38] Ryan: And it's, you know, [00:20:40] it's, my question to you is that there are people out there who are going to say, my circumstances don't allow me to get more sleep and to have less [00:20:50] stress because my job, because I have, you know.

[00:20:52] Ryan: A newborn baby stuff like that.

[00:20:54] Maggie: Yeah. And that's the reality of your life. Like I don't, I don't fight people on that kind of stuff. There's just, [00:21:00] there's a way we tell a story that can be helpful or unhelpful. And then there's circumstances that it is what it is. Like you have like clinical insomnia, you've tried everything you can possibly do.

[00:21:08] Maggie: You don't sleep. Okay. [00:21:10] So that's a circumstance that we're dealing with. You get to choose how to see the fact that you have clinical insomnia that is untreatable and whether you want weight loss to be part of the [00:21:20] picture. Um, you have a baby. It won't be a tiny baby forever, but like that, yeah, it, it is what it is.

[00:21:26] Maggie: Everyone is at different stages in life and I'm not going to fight you that there [00:21:30] aren't times that feel much, much harder.

[00:21:32] Ryan: And that's true about jobs too. Like jobs aren't super stressful forever, are they? It kind of ebbs and flows.

[00:21:38] Maggie: Yeah. There will be circumstances that [00:21:40] make things harder, and then there's also the story that we tell ourselves about it that can make it much, much harder.

[00:21:46] Music: Right, right.

[00:21:47] Maggie: Because then we're not asking, like, are there any other things I could do to [00:21:50] solve this problem? Is there Any, any way I can see this problem differently? Because like sometimes you can't change the problem. You can't. That, and that's the whole thing about circumstances is they're [00:22:00] not really up to you.

[00:22:01] Maggie: So, if you can't, then the only thing you really have control over is how do I make it easier despite this circumstance? And is this something I want to do in the [00:22:10] midst of a circumstance? So, I don't have a solve to your unsolvable circumstance, you know? But

[00:22:16] Ryan: what you can change is how you think about it.

[00:22:18] Ryan: Yeah. That's true.

[00:22:19] Maggie: That's [00:22:20] really Mostly all you can change.

[00:22:22] Ryan: Right.

[00:22:22] Maggie: Yeah.

[00:22:23] Ryan: If I've learned one thing in therapy, that's it.

[00:22:25] Maggie: Yeah.

[00:22:25] Ryan: That's, that's it.

[00:22:27] Maggie: Yeah.

[00:22:27] Ryan: That's the only thing you have control over.

[00:22:29] Maggie: Same, [00:22:30] yeah.

[00:22:30] Ryan: Anyways, I, uh, hope this helped, guys.

[00:22:33] Maggie: One more? Just kidding. No. Well, no, because I thought it was the last one like two or three ago and then you said another one and I'm like, dude, where are these [00:22:40] coming from?

[00:22:40] Maggie: I wrote five down. I know, but I feel like, I don't feel like we took so long to answer each one. Yeah. It's just funny. All right. All right. See you next week.

[00:22:47] Ryan: See ya.

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