[00:00:00] Oh

[00:00:00] Maggie: yeah.[00:00:10]

[00:00:13] Maggie: Hello everybody. Welcome to the podcast.

[00:00:16] Ryan: Good morning.

[00:00:18] Maggie: It's going good. I just got off a [00:00:20] coaching call actually.

[00:00:20] Ryan: Oh yeah?

[00:00:21] Maggie: Yeah.

[00:00:21] Ryan: How'd it go?

[00:00:22] Maggie: And I walked upstairs and I was like, Oh shit, we got to go record podcast, huh? Like, I guess walk me back down to the basement.

[00:00:28] Ryan: Yeah.

[00:00:29] Maggie: We're excited [00:00:30] to be here. It was a good coaching call.

[00:00:32] Maggie: Um, Yeah. We had a waitlist only opening this last weekend.

[00:00:36] Ryan: Oh, yeah,

[00:00:37] Maggie: so we welcomed I we told you guys so [00:00:40] I hope you Heard I put

[00:00:42] Ryan: that waitlist link in every show notes, too

[00:00:44] Maggie: Yeah, the waitlist is in the show notes. And so there are Occasionally times to join vibe club [00:00:50] that are outside of my public openings where it's just like open And we're announcing it everywhere and everything.

[00:00:55] Maggie: So it's just like a secret one. But anyways, welcome to everybody who [00:01:00] is Ready to do things different for the holiday season

[00:01:04] Ryan: Um, we should probably talk about that pot roast video I posted.

[00:01:08] Maggie: Dude.

[00:01:09] Ryan: The [00:01:10]

[00:01:10] Maggie: men especially are so mad, but.

[00:01:12] Ryan: In the life hacks episode, Maggie described how to make her pot roast and I was like, oh, this would, this would be a great video to put on, online.

[00:01:19] Ryan: And [00:01:20] so I was like, make sure next time you make a pot roast, I'll film it and then I can kind of cut it together with the podcast.

[00:01:25] Maggie: Yeah.

[00:01:26] Ryan: And this video went absolutely viral.

[00:01:28] Maggie: Yeah. And it's [00:01:30] just because Ryan knows how to cut things together. Because the, the opening part of the video is me saying, I am the pot roast queen.

[00:01:38] Maggie: And I want to tell you guys for [00:01:40] any of the, here's a little business tip for you guys who are out there running businesses, which Ryan is fully aware of, which I try to avoid at all costs. When you make a statement like that, people immediately [00:01:50] are like, let me watch this fucking video and I'm going to figure out how this girl is wrong.

[00:01:53] Maggie: When you make a statement like that, people stick around. To prove that you this [00:02:00] to kick you down. Yeah, it's great for engagement. It's not great for my feelings Just kidding. My feelings are are fine. But dude, I on on Instagram right now. It's almost at 2 [00:02:10] million.

[00:02:10] Ryan: Yeah

[00:02:10] Maggie: on tiktok. I don't know. I haven't checked

[00:02:11] Ryan: that's really unheard of for instagram Yeah, it's

[00:02:13] Maggie: gone.

[00:02:14] Maggie: Absolutely wild now Listen, so he wanted me to make this pot roast and he had a meeting that was going to start and of course, you know With [00:02:20] pot roast you have to like get him in at the right time so I did the shittiest sear, and you would think I did it on purpose to get [00:02:30] engagement, but I didn't. The reason why we did it like that was because we were in a rush, and he had to get to a meeting, and I had to get this freaking pot roast in.

[00:02:36] Maggie: I didn't even want to tape it, and so we did this really [00:02:40] crappy pot roast, or this really crappy sear, and it, like, people are like, you didn't sear it, you grayed it, and like, just, You guys wait till I get my hex clad. I mean,

[00:02:48] Ryan: half the comments are about the seer. She did.

[00:02:49] Maggie: [00:02:50] Yes.

[00:02:50] Ryan: And so the, the, um, tricks on you, you know, like we got a lot of comments out of a shitty seer.

[00:02:58] Ryan: And so

[00:02:58] Maggie: listen, you guys here, [00:03:00] you know, if you're listening to my podcast, you're a real one. Anyways, you're not one of the haters, right? You're not one of the people leaving one of these comments. The only points I was trying to make, because if you guys remember that podcast, I didn't even [00:03:10] bring up the seer.

[00:03:10] Maggie: I don't even think that's a super important thing. I don't even know why I do it, okay? What I needed everyone to know is get a pot roast, get a chuck roast, cook it on low for eight hours. [00:03:20] Because every time I make it, everyone's like, how do you make it? I'm not claiming to be Gordon Ramsay, okay? I am not a Michelin chef.

[00:03:27] Ryan: You're talking to people who don't know how [00:03:30] to make a fall apart roast.

[00:03:31] Maggie: Yeah, that's it.

[00:03:32] Ryan: And these people think you're Gordon Ramsay, like claiming

[00:03:35] Maggie: like, oh, she uses an onion soup packet. Oh my gosh. They're so mad. So if you want some [00:03:40] entertainment, go check out one of these posts and read the comments.

[00:03:42] Maggie: People are so pressed and it's so funny. And

[00:03:45] Ryan: that's a great way to get engagement on social media.

[00:03:48] Maggie: But see, it's so against [00:03:50] me, like I just, to say things that are just like, to make people like, Ryan just got lucky because I said it in the podcast and he was able to clip it together, right? I would never create a [00:04:00] video on purpose like that, ever.

[00:04:00] Maggie: The way I clipped

[00:04:01] Ryan: it together, I had to rearrange it, the order in which you said things.

[00:04:04] Maggie: Well, you want to know the worst part? Is that I said it should say chuck roast and it shouldn't [00:04:10] have any other words Bro, the ones that the one that walmart gave me said chuck pot roast and they were like, oh, so are you sure?

[00:04:17] Maggie: It's not supposed to say another word. Is this are you sure you got the right [00:04:20] one? I'm, like you guys are you look like a bunch of clowns right now. Okay, give me a break so anyways ryan does a lot of the editing of my videos and

[00:04:29] Ryan: I do it [00:04:30] sometimes

[00:04:30] Maggie: they're edited in a way that You I wouldn't have said that directly and he makes it a little bit more punchy, uhhuh, and, and more good for, but you guys here, if you're on [00:04:40] the podcast, you get the context.

[00:04:41] Maggie: You guys get me? Okay? , you know that I do not claim to be this amazing cook. You the pot rush queen, but you should see how [00:04:50] mad people are. That's hilarious. About the onion soup, about the sear, about the fact that I added liquid, about the fact that I didn't add vegetables about, I mean. At any [00:05:00] second of that video, they are ripping it apart.

[00:05:02] Ryan: And it's got three and a half million views across two platforms, so like, leave your comment. Well, and I've gained like 7, 000

[00:05:07] Maggie: followers. Yeah. So like, that's the, that's what [00:05:10] sucks about social media. It's like, if you're not getting people being really mad and like, rude to you, and like, taking attacks at you as a personal human.

[00:05:18] Ryan: Yeah.

[00:05:19] Maggie: Your account probably [00:05:20] isn't growing. Ah, worst news. Anyways, so yeah, we had to talk about that here because you guys will laugh along with us.

[00:05:29] Ryan: [00:05:30] And even the new people who found you on Instagram who may be listening to this podcast like for the first time.

[00:05:33] Maggie: Yeah, oh my gosh, you guys have got to tell me if you found me and you are somehow now listening to this podcast.

[00:05:39] Maggie: This [00:05:40] podcast from the pot roast post, I've got to know you have to DM me because that is hilarious.

[00:05:46] Ryan: Of

[00:05:46] Maggie: course, the goal when a video goes wide is to like reach people that have no idea that [00:05:50] you exist and say, Hey, this is, this is, you know, things that I could maybe help you with. Um, but sometimes I doubt a pot roast video like that is going to like convert to [00:06:00] people being like, I really want to listen to what this woman has to say when everyone had such terrible things to say about me as a human, but okay.

[00:06:08] Maggie: So. [00:06:10] We had two topics to talk about.

[00:06:12] Ryan: Two?

[00:06:12] Maggie: One. Okay. We didn't decide which one it was going to be. We're

[00:06:15] Ryan: winging it today.

[00:06:17] Maggie: We're going just however the vibes take [00:06:20] us. Okay. Let's talk about emotional eating.

[00:06:26] Ryan: Okay.

[00:06:26] Maggie: Let's talk about why a lot of people don't [00:06:30] see themselves as emotional eaters. Do you consider yourself an emotional eater?

[00:06:35] Ryan: It's not something I'm like, super honed in on and focused on, but I, I, I, [00:06:40] absolutely emotional eat. But do you

[00:06:41] Maggie: think you would consider yourself that if you weren't married to me and were doing this podcast with me and didn't have me coaching people? The protein bar I

[00:06:48] Ryan: just ate was probably an emotional [00:06:50] eat.

[00:06:50] Maggie: Oh, why? What was going on?

[00:06:52] Ryan: I wasn't hungry.

[00:06:53] Maggie: Oh. So why did you eat it?

[00:06:54] Ryan: I just wanted one.

[00:06:55] Maggie: Okay,

[00:06:57] Ryan: and the feeling of not having one was [00:07:00] not something I wanted to feel. Yeah,

[00:07:01] Maggie: okay So Ryan is giving a really good example and it came kind of from an interaction I had with one of my clients that was just claiming like I was talking a little about emotional eating in a [00:07:10] In a Facebook post and she was just saying like sometimes I'm overeating because I just want to taste the food Like I just want to eat the food.

[00:07:16] Maggie: I don't think there's a feeling attached to it. And I was like, Oh, this gives me such a [00:07:20] good idea for a podcast because I think the way people see emotional eating is like a lot more dramatic than it actually is. Like a lot of, and you know what? After saying that, I think it's [00:07:30] rarely that dramatic. You guys see emotional eating as like, my boyfriend just broke up with me and I'm digging into Haagen-Dazs.

[00:07:37] Ryan: Yeah.

[00:07:37] Maggie: That's the way it's been portrayed on tv. It's like, and honestly,

[00:07:39] Ryan: if your [00:07:40] boyfriend just broke up with you, eat the Haagen-Dazs .

[00:07:42] Maggie: You know what I mean? Yeah. But that kind of stuff normally isn't happening. Like we're not in this deep period of grief all the time, and yet we are [00:07:50] emotionally eating a lot of the time.

[00:07:51] Ryan: But but how many how many comments and stuff like that on social media you do get of like I could never stop it Just tastes so good.

[00:07:58] Maggie: Yeah

[00:07:59] Ryan: That's [00:08:00] more common than what, than like having a stressful event. Well see, I may

[00:08:02] Maggie: think that the problem is just food tastes good and that's the problem. But here's what I want to show you guys is that there are two different ways that I see [00:08:10] emotional eating happening.

[00:08:10] Maggie: One of them is I'm feeling really bad, not even really bad, I'm feeling bad and I want to feel better. So we're avoiding this current [00:08:20] feeling of I'm feeling stressed, I want to not feel stressed anymore. That's the way I think most people view emotional eating. Or some really dramatic thing like I previously mentioned.

[00:08:28] Maggie: What we don't talk about [00:08:30] enough is, I'm feeling fine. I'm feeling okay. But I want to eat that food. Because I just want to taste it. And I don't want to not taste it. And then when I tell you, [00:08:40] Okay, don't eat it then. What's the problem with that? The only problem with that is that on the other end of that is an emotion you don't [00:08:50] want to feel.

[00:08:51] Maggie: So do you see how it works in one way and then it works in the reverse way? I'm feeling bad and I want to feel better. I'm feeling fine and I don't want to feel bad. [00:09:00] Ah, that actually like worked out better. That's why sometimes you got to trust the vibes on these podcasts that it'll just come out the way it needs to come out.

[00:09:07] Maggie: It's like, I'm feeling fine. I [00:09:10] just want to eat food, and if I don't, then I'm going to have to feel disappointed. I don't want to feel, I don't want to feel, I'm feeling good. Let's keep the good feeling going. That's what a lot, a lot of the time when we don't want to stop, it's because we don't want the [00:09:20] pleasurable experience to end, but what's the problem with a pleasurable experience ending?

[00:09:24] Ryan: Feeling bad.

[00:09:25] Maggie: Feeling bad. And that is a form of emotionally eating.

[00:09:28] Ryan: Ooh.

[00:09:29] Maggie: So it's not [00:09:30] that there's necessarily an emotion attached to it. There's just an emotion on the tail end of it that you don't want to feel because the ending of something feels bad. And honestly, that's the whole podcast. [00:09:40] Sorry, I'm in a silly goofy mood today, I guess, which is hilarious because we tried to record podcasts yesterday and we walked down here, we turned the lights on, and then I was like, yeah, I'm not going to do this today.[00:09:50]

[00:09:50] Maggie: And I went upstairs and I actually cried instead, because like hormones, stuff like that. Sometimes you got to trust when it's the right time to record a podcast. So I'm glad because it's coming out the way I want it to, which is great. [00:10:00] Many people I find don't think they're an emotional eater until they get into my program.

[00:10:05] Maggie: Like, they know that they have like a relationship with food they want to heal or like there's something else going on that [00:10:10] attracts them to the work that I do. But they're like, oh, I didn't see that I'm an emotional, I am someone, and you guys, trust me, you don't need to add this to your repertoire of like, I'm an all or nothing [00:10:20] person.

[00:10:20] Maggie: I'm an emotional eater. You don't need to claim this. It doesn't have to be part of your identity. But it is good to know that the reasons why I'm eating are emotionally fueled. I'm Because then we don't have to find you the right [00:10:30] diet. We don't have to find you the right food list of foods that you should be eating and shouldn't be eating.

[00:10:34] Maggie: We have to realize that you're often times eating to stop feeling bad and you're often times eating to [00:10:40] keep feeling good. So, all of those are rooted in I don't want to feel something. I either don't want to feel it now or I don't want to feel it later. And if I can keep the food in [00:10:50] my mouth, I'll never have, this will never have to end.

[00:10:52] Ryan: This can be applied to over drinking too, right? Yes.

[00:10:55] Maggie: Yes.

[00:10:56] Ryan: It's not really

[00:10:57] Maggie: my wheelhouse, like in what way.

[00:10:58] Ryan: Let's dive in.

[00:10:59] Maggie: [00:11:00] Yeah, dive in. Because this is also a time of year where I think drinking goes up as well. I think a

[00:11:04] Ryan: lot of people have alcohol questions that you just don't relate to.

[00:11:08] Maggie: I don't. Yeah.

[00:11:09] Maggie: [00:11:10] That's not really like, my assistant coach Monica is better for those kinds of things. Oh, yeah. You

[00:11:16] Ryan: should have her on the podcast. Because I just

[00:11:17] Maggie: don't really, I totally should have her on the podcast. Because [00:11:20] I, um, and I have had her on the podcast before. You guys should do an alcohol podcast. Oh, maybe we will.

[00:11:25] Ryan: Do that.

[00:11:26] Maggie: Yeah. That's what's good about having other coaches around because there are [00:11:30] things that like I just don't drink and my reasons for not drinking is that. It makes me feel super shitty, but I also understand because I used to drink and I used to do it [00:11:40] in a way that was bad. I overdrank. There was no like drinking in moderation for me, but yeah, to keep it going, it's like I don't want, especially with alcohol, because you want to keep it [00:11:50] in your system because like once, well, that's such a double edged sword though, because if you keep it going, then you feel worse and worse and worse.

[00:11:57] Maggie: And yeah, the feeling that you're feeling, it's like we just are [00:12:00] prolonging, like I just don't want to feel bad. As long as possible, but it's coming. So yeah.

[00:12:05] Ryan: Interesting. It

[00:12:06] Maggie: applies. Yeah. We'll keep that in mind, especially for, for the holidays and the way that, [00:12:10] that drinking goes up in the holidays. So, yeah, I just wanted to just kind of address that I don't really know of many other angles to go at it from other than to know that [00:12:20] if you are someone who is constantly saying like food just tastes so good I just want to taste it I just don't I just like the way it tastes that's fine but I want you to realize [00:12:30] that what's on the other end of that is you not wanting that goodness to end and like it's getting more comfortable allowing yourself to be able to let it end.[00:12:40]

[00:12:40] Maggie: Because it's always going to end at some point. You have to choose to stop at some point. Many people are just choosing to stop at a point where now they're sick or now they, you know, their stomach hurts or they [00:12:50] totally overate or whatever. That's the sign to stop versus, yeah, it's going to feel a little bit like a loss here to stop [00:13:00] eating.

[00:13:00] Maggie: Because I guess that's kind of more what we're talking about in this podcast, which is the other side of, of emotional eating, which is just like, I don't want the goodness to stop. [00:13:10]

[00:13:10] Ryan: It's always, you always say this to choose your discomfort.

[00:13:13] Maggie: Yes. Because it's going to come, it's going to come one way or another.

[00:13:16] Maggie: And a lot of the time the discomfort you're choosing is just one that isn't supportive to the [00:13:20] goals that you have.

[00:13:20] Ryan: Right.

[00:13:21] Maggie: I always think in terms of like, there's cookies on the counter. I'm going to be discouraged if I'm [00:13:30] eating them when I'm not hungry, and then I know I'm overfueling my body, and so I'm eating more than I need, which means I'm not eating in a way that is going to help me lose weight, or [00:13:40] the alternative to that is I'm disappointed because I have to feel the loss of I didn't eat the cookie, so it's like, I'm disappointed because I ate it, I'm disappointed because I didn't eat it, One of those [00:13:50] disappointments, I know it's cliche, like one of them is going to help you get to your goals and one of them isn't, but you're not actually avoiding disappointment.

[00:13:56] Maggie: You think you are by eating the cookie. [00:14:00] And again, I don't want to make this so drama about like the cookie. I hate that I use examples like that. I'm going to start using like vegetables and hummus that you just love hummus or something. I got to stop using cookie as an example because people are [00:14:10] like, yeah, sugar, but that's not what we're talking about here.

[00:14:12] Maggie: We're talking about There's going to be a feeling of disappointment here. Is it going to be disappointment because you overate and ate when you weren't hungry or is it going to be disappointment because you [00:14:20] didn't eat the thing?

[00:14:21] Ryan: Yeah.

[00:14:22] Maggie: It's coming either way.

[00:14:23] Ryan: Yeah. There was one where we went to the Mexican restaurant and I just stared at the chips and salsa.

[00:14:27] Ryan: Did I already talk about that?

[00:14:29] Maggie: I don't think [00:14:30] so.

[00:14:30] Ryan: We went to and we're going there tonight for dinner.

[00:14:32] Maggie: Yeah,

[00:14:33] Ryan: and they bring out the you know, the free chips and salsa and One time we went there and I decided before and I'm like I'm not eating chips and salsa You

[00:14:39] Maggie: frequently would [00:14:40] eat so much of the chips and salsa that you by the time you were like I'm gonna eat my food that You would it would not be a good experience.

[00:14:46] Ryan: Yeah,

[00:14:46] Maggie: so you chose that ahead of time. I'm not gonna do that

[00:14:48] Ryan: It was so uncomfortable just [00:14:50] sitting there.

[00:14:50] Maggie: Yeah,

[00:14:50] Ryan: just looking at the chips and salsa. Watching you eat

[00:14:53] Maggie: it.

[00:14:54] Ryan: Because it's one of, it's, it's so good.

[00:14:56] Maggie: Yeah.

[00:14:57] Ryan: It's such a good appetizer. It's one of my favorite things. You were really

[00:14:59] Maggie: choosing your [00:15:00] discomfort there because you could have just ate less of your dinner.

[00:15:02] Ryan: Yeah.

[00:15:03] Maggie: There were other options there. That was just the one that you chose.

[00:15:06] Ryan: Yeah, but I didn't like I would I you want to enjoy the meal focused on [00:15:10] protein. That's what I ordered

[00:15:11] Maggie: We're

[00:15:16] Ryan: laughing at it inside

[00:15:16] Maggie: ryan told me the other day I gotta stop saying protein focused and when he just [00:15:20] said I was focused Focused on protein.

[00:15:21] Maggie: I had to take that chance. , I had to take it 'cause it was the only option is that we're recording a podcast and I had to, had to take it.

[00:15:28] Ryan: Okay. Okay. Touche. Okay, so you

[00:15:29] Maggie: were [00:15:30] protein focused. Yes. . Go on. .

[00:15:34] Ryan: I don't even remember what I was talking about anymore. That

[00:15:36] Maggie: was your focus. Your focus wasn't chips. It was,

[00:15:38] Ryan: but it, it was just [00:15:40] it.

[00:15:41] Ryan: I. I'm just like reflecting on it. It's it's so crazy how uncomfortable I felt not eating that chips and salsa And I remember vividly when I like when [00:15:50] we walked away from the table done eating paid our check I was like, wow, you didn't die.

[00:15:53] Maggie: Yeah,

[00:15:54] Ryan: you didn't die I felt like a little bit like I was it feels

[00:15:57] Maggie: so dramatic in our body The same thing happened We were just [00:16:00] in saint george for fall break with our kids and I tried one of your mom's cookies And they're so good and they like have nuts in them too like chocolate chip with some we don't ever

[00:16:06] Ryan: put nuts and cookies No, I don't and I like nuts.

[00:16:09] Ryan: Yeah

[00:16:09] Maggie: Yeah, [00:16:10] and she puts them in, um, cinnamon rolls too. But as you guys know, I'm, I'm a raisins in my cinnamon roll kind of girl, which we'll get into that later on in the season. But anyways, um, I had [00:16:20] one and one was it for me. Like as far as the day was concerned, I was not hungry. I was good. I had one. I immediately was [00:16:30] like, I want six of these with milk immediately.

[00:16:34] Maggie: And I didn't, I had that one. It's like, You will feel [00:16:40] invincible if you can just get comfortable with feeling that feeling of wanting. It is okay to want something without giving it to [00:16:50] yourself. You have to do it in lots of other areas of your life. Desire can be there without you answering it immediately or at all.

[00:16:57] Maggie: I had a cookie. My brain immediately was like, that was [00:17:00] so good. Six exit. Immediately, six exit.

[00:17:03] Ryan: If, if, if one's good, more must be better.

[00:17:05] Maggie: Yeah, and I was just like, I'm not hungry. If I eat six, I'm gonna feel [00:17:10] sick. The cookies were all right there. There was nothing stopping me from eating six. And I even shared it with Ryan.

[00:17:15] Maggie: I was like, I want to do a whole podcast on this because it felt so dramatic. It felt

[00:17:19] Ryan: [00:17:20] so The way we're talking about it is we're describing victories, but I'll have you know, I did eat six of those cookies.

[00:17:26] Maggie: Oh, so we were, we were in different states there. Yeah.

[00:17:29] Ryan: I mean, [00:17:30] I probably have more than six. Okay. So like we're not winning this every time.

[00:17:33] Maggie: No. No,

[00:17:35] Ryan: you know, it's not a

[00:17:37] Maggie: It's not a constant win thing, but the wins happen and the [00:17:40] wins are important and acknowledging the wins is important. But yeah, it's not always going to be like, I want it and I always leave it behind. There are times when that's not the case. And in those [00:17:50] moments we're trading, in that moment, he traded.

[00:17:53] Maggie: I don't want this to end. And you did you feel good? Did you feel fine after you ate them? Was there payment? [00:18:00]

[00:18:00] Ryan: In the form of I mean, you don't ever the funny thing is is you don't ever want it to end So at some point it has to

[00:18:06] Maggie: end but it ended too late still it just ended too late [00:18:10]

[00:18:10] Ryan: I'm, just thinking like at some point it ends right

[00:18:14] Maggie: always ends

[00:18:15] Ryan: and so you can either end it sooner or later What's the difference?[00:18:20]

[00:18:20] Maggie: It's like literally your ability to cut yourself off That the only difference is how soon you're willing to have that conversation of that's enough. And for me, I said, that's enough. It's one. And I [00:18:30] wanted more so, so badly. But I cut myself off and I was fine. I felt bummed because it was so good. I wanted, I wanted to [00:18:40] extend that experience.

[00:18:41] Maggie: I didn't want that experience to end. But I also am good at telling myself it's ending either way. It can end in a stomachache or it can end with this feeling of [00:18:50] damn it. I really want more, right? There's a scale of, of when it ends. There's a scale of when we cut ourselves off. And the goal will always be shortening [00:19:00] the length of time before you cut yourself off.

[00:19:02] Maggie: And even me saying cut yourself off sounds so dramatic. Like it does sound like I

[00:19:06] Ryan: got a bar.

[00:19:06] Maggie: Yeah. You're like cutting you off, but, but we have to [00:19:10] have the ability to To cut ourselves off and to be like, you're fine. You don't think Maude doesn't want six cookies. Of course she does

[00:19:17] Ryan: Yeah, someone has to cut her off.

[00:19:18] Maggie: Someone's got to cut her off [00:19:20] I've got to be the adult in that situation and be like, okay two is enough. Okay, we'll have more cookies tomorrow You know, I have to do the same thing with myself Sometimes we [00:19:30] it's so surprising to me how we let our toddler brains Run away with like I'm eating six because I just want them.

[00:19:36] Maggie: I don't want to eat one. I want six It does sound like a [00:19:40] kid and sometimes we're gonna give a kid six cookies and other times we're gonna be like, whoa, slow down I mean, that's how you get overweight. You let the toddler

[00:19:46] Ryan: run the show for years.

[00:19:48] Maggie: Yes, we [00:19:50] were looking at some old pictures Yeah, and Ryan Ryan's response.

[00:19:53] Maggie: It was from my first birth and Ryan. I found a picture of him eating like a

[00:19:57] Ryan: Whatever it was.

[00:19:57] Maggie: It was kneaders. It was, it was French toast. [00:20:00] Yeah. Someone had brought us, my doula had brought us French toast. And you were like, and he obviously looks very different than he looks now. Um, and he was like, that's the result of letting yourself go [00:20:10] unchecked for years and never giving a thought to anything you eat.

[00:20:13] Maggie: Yeah, it is. That's all it was. We didn't think about that. The only thought we ever had probably was like, I should probably go on a diet. [00:20:20] But I, I, other, I should probably lose some weight. But there was never a like, I should probably stop eating fast food seven times a day.

[00:20:28] Ryan: It's crazy because in that moment, I [00:20:30] never really looked at myself and thought like, whoa, you're far gone.

[00:20:32] Maggie: Yeah.

[00:20:33] Ryan: But seeing it now, it's like clearly.

[00:20:35] Maggie: It just, if nothing more than taking all the drama and putting the math in, it was like eat [00:20:40] whatever you want, whenever you want, in whatever quantities you want, and you will be 60 pounds overweight.

[00:20:44] Ryan: That's the algorithm right there. That was, that

[00:20:46] Maggie: was the truth for both of us.

[00:20:47] Ryan: Yeah.

[00:20:49] Maggie: And then [00:20:50] try to do something completely different from that for two days. And that was my dieting attempts.

[00:20:55] Ryan: Dude.

[00:20:55] Maggie: That was my attempts to lose weight.

[00:20:57] Ryan: That's just so crazy to think about.

[00:20:59] Maggie: And what it [00:21:00] was, it was a lack of cutting ourselves off. It was a lack of being like, no, like sometimes we're just so unwilling to tell ourselves no and people are like, that's [00:21:10] restriction.

[00:21:10] Maggie: It's like, no, it's not. Like, there's got to be someone in charge being like, that's enough. I didn't tell myself no cookies. That's not restriction. I had a cookie. That [00:21:20] was all I had space for that night. Any more than that would have been dishonoring my body. That is not restrictive. That is actually completely honoring my body and what my body is telling me.[00:21:30]

[00:21:30] Maggie: So we've gotta, we've gotta stop, um, associating no or that's enough with, I just don't want to restrict myself. It's [00:21:40] not, it's not, yeah, you know, actually, I'll give it to you guys. It is restrict. I restricted myself from eating six cookies. I did. [00:21:50] Because six cookies wouldn't have been good for me. Six cookies was not what my body needed.

[00:21:54] Maggie: Six cookies is not what my freaking stomach could have handled. Six cookies is, does not align with the weight goals that I [00:22:00] have. Six cookies, I did. I restricted myself from eating six cookies. People use that

[00:22:03] Ryan: word restrictive to be permissive.

[00:22:06] Maggie: Yeah. Right? Yeah. Because, ah, it's so hard [00:22:10] because there's so much nuance to everything that I'm like, oh, you, like, of course my big, like, goal and message is like not restricting yourself.

[00:22:17] Maggie: Sure. But then people are like, oh, so [00:22:20] permissive free for all. Yeah. No, that's not what I meant either. I don't restrict myself. I allow myself to eat the foods that I want in the amounts that feel best for my body. Right. [00:22:30] And that allows me to not, but you're right. If you want to get down to like brass tacks on it, I do restrict myself from eating six cookies.

[00:22:37] Maggie: And that's very good for me because [00:22:40] then I'm not sick, then I don't feel like I'm gonna throw up before I go to bed, then I can get good sleep. Like those things are important to me. I don't like eating to that point anymore. It makes me [00:22:50] feel very, very, very uncomfortable in my body. Six cookies would have led to that.

[00:22:54] Maggie: So, yeah, you wanna,

[00:22:56] Ryan: there's a lot of nuance there. There

[00:22:57] Maggie: is a lot of nuance.

[00:22:58] Ryan: Yeah.

[00:22:59] Maggie: And I [00:23:00] always hate that. I feel like everything that I say can be used to someone's, like, they can use it in a way that it's like, well chop it up until put on TikTok. And then you're like, okay, yeah, exactly. Wait until you're hungry.

[00:23:09] Maggie: So [00:23:10] they wait until they're starving. Don't restrict yourself. Okay, let myself have whatever I want. Right? There's just a way to take anything that I say. You've gotta understand the nuance of it. That like the goal is that we're going for balanced. It's that [00:23:20] when, when my mother-in-law brought cookies, my first thought was, well, I can't have any of those.

[00:23:24] Maggie: That was when I was restricting myself.

[00:23:25] Ryan: Yeah. When you were keto?

[00:23:28] Maggie: Yeah. When it was literally like, [00:23:30] that's a no. May as well put a big red X on that. Not for me. Not part of my diet. You know, it's like, no, it's not like that. But that does require something on my part. It requires me [00:23:40] to be the cookie monitor of my life.

[00:23:41] Maggie: The same way I'm the cookie monitor of my kids lives. My kids get cookies. But the reality is that like, they would eat 50 of them if we let them. And [00:23:50] like, And the fact is, is

[00:23:51] Ryan: you wouldn't let your kids eat 50 cookies. Yeah. So why are you letting yourself eat 50 cookies? It's just Come on guys.

[00:23:56] Maggie: You gotta know when [00:24:00] to say enough is enough and the great news is your body helps you do that.

[00:24:04] Maggie: Your body will let you know what's enough and sometimes you're gonna ignore that and that's okay. That happens too. And [00:24:10] I love those times because they remind me why I listen to my body.

[00:24:12] Ryan: And you know what, dude?

[00:24:14] Maggie: What?

[00:24:15] Ryan: I love when I do that on purpose.

[00:24:17] Maggie: Yeah.

[00:24:18] Ryan: I'm like, you know what? I'm going to ignore my [00:24:20] body.

[00:24:20] Ryan: You did it on your birthday. And I don't give a shit, dude. I did it on my birthday. I ate donuts, dude. But it feels good when you intentionally do it and you're like, [00:24:30] no regrets.

[00:24:30] Maggie: I don't

[00:24:31] Ryan: care.

[00:24:31] Maggie: I still have regrets because I'm like, oh, this feels terrible. But, but I get what you mean where you're like, it was intentional.

[00:24:36] Maggie: It wasn't reactive. It wasn't like, oh, I'm just going to, oh, what happened? It's like, [00:24:40] no, I'm just, I'm going to eat. I just woke up that morning. I

[00:24:41] Ryan: said, I have one birthday a year. So why couldn't I just do whatever I want on this one day?

[00:24:46] Maggie: I know. But you know, we talked about that in the car.

[00:24:49] Ryan: Huh?

[00:24:49] Maggie: [00:24:50] About like, well, we're going to briefly touch on this because we were wrapping this podcast up, but he was like, he was talking about how it was his birthday and like, he was just going to eat what he wanted and blah, blah, blah.

[00:24:59] Maggie: And I was like, [00:25:00] Yeah. Cause you're just like giving yourself a gift and I was like, the gift is you get to feel like shit. So we're like, you're giving yourself a gift, but the gift is shit. And like, so he's like, write that [00:25:10] down. Maybe we'll podcast about it. So this is that podcast where we're going to like, it is, it is what it is.

[00:25:14] Maggie: The point is he did it intentionally, but it's also funny because the gift is you, you felt like [00:25:20] shit at the end of your birthday and like, sometimes you need those reminders where you're like, Oh, this is why I don't do this.

[00:25:25] Ryan: There was no. You know what I mean? Like, I knew I was going to feel like shit.

[00:25:29] Maggie: Yeah, but isn't that [00:25:30] funny? Like, if you really think about that, it makes no sense. But you're like, but it doesn't, it doesn't have to make sense. It was one day. It's my birthday. Yeah. For one day a year, it cannot make sense. Yeah. And you can live like you used to [00:25:40] live so that you can remind yourself why you don't live why you used to live anymore.

[00:25:44] Ryan: Honestly. It is a good reminder.

[00:25:46] Maggie: It is every time I overeat. I'm like, yeah, that's why I don't do that shit [00:25:50] anymore

[00:25:50] Ryan: Yeah,

[00:25:51] Maggie: and I and that's good because that used to be my I used to not know a difference That used to be my regular feeling of all the time So it is fine to have those [00:26:00] reminders but use them for what they are and be like, oh, yeah I I remember why most people will be like, oh, why did I do that?

[00:26:04] Maggie: I'm going backwards I yeah, I know better and it's like no to take it for what it was and be like, yeah And this is [00:26:10] why I don't do that. But normal Eaters overeat sometimes and everyone needs to remember that and normal eaters emotionally eat. Sometimes people who listen to their body on on a really regular basis They push it.

[00:26:19] Maggie: [00:26:20] Sometimes they get distracted when they're with friends. They overeat on purpose They overeat on accident if that's part of the human experience

[00:26:27] Ryan: It's the same thing with alcohol every time I decide like to have a few [00:26:30] drinks. I'm like Yeah, I remember why I don't do this.

[00:26:32] Maggie: I know. And every time, guys, I tell him that and he just, he doesn't care.

[00:26:35] Maggie: He's gotta learn it for himself, which I can, I have to, I have to remind

[00:26:37] Ryan: myself probably once a quarter I'm not to, we'll

[00:26:39] Maggie: go on [00:26:40] vacation and he'll go to Pappy's market and pick up a thing of alcohol. Yeah. And I'm like, bro, what you trying to ruin this trip right now? Like me just like whispering these things like I trying to ruin tomorrow.

[00:26:49] Maggie: Okay, have a good [00:26:50] time. He drinks one night and that's it.

[00:26:52] Ryan: I'm just like, dude, why did I do that? It's like drinking gasoline.

[00:26:57] Maggie: The Sterlings, we're not drinkers, okay? [00:27:00] We're not. We're just not. At the beginning of our life, it was because we were Mormon, and now it's just because it makes us feel like ass, so.

[00:27:07] Ryan: Yeah.

[00:27:07] Maggie: The Mormons, maybe they were right about that. [00:27:10]

[00:27:10] Ryan: You think so?

[00:27:12] Maggie: I mean.

[00:27:12] Ryan: Justice Smith drank.

[00:27:14] Maggie: Yeah. He drank a lot. It's messy. Okay, we're going to wrap up this podcast. We're going to wrap up this podcast. All right, you guys, so [00:27:20] just keep in mind, we're going to, I'm going to circle this back and wrap it up real nice, which is, it's not a big deal if you eat emotionally, but also just remember that if you are continuing to [00:27:30] eat.

[00:27:31] Maggie: it's probably an emotionally charged thing as well. And the best thing that you can do is allow yourself to learn to sit in that discomfort. And I know that sucks, but the [00:27:40] better you get at it, the more you can be like this, this was going to come to an end. I was going to feel disappointed. Those cookies were really good.

[00:27:47] Maggie: And we can end it after one, when our body says one is good, or [00:27:50] we can end it after six, when our body says, Whoa, dude, what did you just do? But it doesn't matter. At some point, it's going to have to end. And what you're avoiding By not ending it, is the uncomfortable emotion. [00:28:00] So, that is emotionally charged.

[00:28:03] Maggie: And you could benefit from learning how to feel your feelings all the way through, and sit in that discomfort, and then remind [00:28:10] yourself when you're on the other end, like Ryan did, with the chips and salsa, Uh, yeah, I didn't die, though. And maybe I'll do it differently, but You also were [00:28:20] avoiding the fact that even if you had tried to eat the chips and salsa, you wouldn't have been able to eat as much as you wanted to.

[00:28:25] Maggie: That would have been some, like, you just chose your discomfort in a specific way. And tonight, I [00:28:30] would love to hear your plan. What is your plan for the chips and salsa tonight?

[00:28:32] Ryan: I'll have some.

[00:28:32] Maggie: Okay. And now he's going to try it a different way and see how that works. All right, you guys. Talk

[00:28:38] Ryan: to you next week.[00:28:40]

[00:28:40] Ryan: See

[00:28:40] you [00:28:50] guys.

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